Sounds like a job for Triangle Man

$25 + subscription and/or SD card

I’m not saying this is what the backup batteries on my modem and in my rack are specifically for, but it would definitely prevent downtime from a Droney McTinFoil von Transformer scenario

Fuckin’ Lars, man

So the libertarian solution to eliminate taxes is essentially GoFundMe, where the burden of support for those in need falls only on those who possess both empathy and the financial means to engage in philanthropy?